androidvictoriam: (rifle on back)
(Paladin) Danse ([personal profile] androidvictoriam) wrote2025-06-17 06:31 am

for taediosum

[ Disgusting, he'd called those patches of temporary scales growing through the injuries on his own face and arms, that first day here. It had been the very first experience he'd had with any kind of transformation, back when his arms still had a relatively ordinary amount of hair on them, and his face hadn't needed to be shaved twice a day to keep his beard in check, to say nothing of the ears and the tail and the fangs and the way everything has an impossibly vivid scent now and all the rest of it besides. Maybe it was just the unexpectedness of the scales. Maybe it was the bright copperhead color, seeming garish to him even when he wasn't objecting to it on his truck or his uniform.

He doesn't know. He can't logically account for why he'd thought those ones were ugly, whereas the ones on Arcade now are...elegant, is the word that periodically comes to mind. Like marble, he's caught himself thinking; like the kind of ancient statue that seems of a piece with the Latin he quotes. But Danse tries not to think much about any of that. What good does it do him?

There's a grace to both the scales and the extra arms they cover, and those are another thing he has to deliberately stop himself from thinking about sometimes, or watching as they move, mesmerizing in the way they maneuver together. He tells himself he's just impressed by the efficiency of having twice as many arms for necessary tasks. He doesn't even believe himself. But it doesn't matter. Things are still so newly and tentatively civil between them these days, and it would be downright irresponsible to let something as frivolous as this make it weird again. If there's one thing Danse knows how to do when he tries, it's force any and all physical desire down into a lead-lined little box and keep things professional.

There's plenty to keep him occupied anyway, as they move north into ever-colder territory. Even were he not sporting an amount of insulating fur now that feels just barely within the realm of still human (or human-adjacent), this is just the kind of autumnal cold it gets in the Commonwealth. A Commonwealth fall might as well be a Capital winter, but he's roughed it outdoors through both of those for deep recon ops and come out the other side only mildly frostbitten for the wear, and he can chop wood and forage food and build campfires with the best of them. He's perfectly in his element. He'd still been cheerfully sleeping out in his truck bed until a few days ago, stealing an extra blanket from the sleeping car and carrying on as usual. He knows not everyone's built for cold weather; he's heard complaints already, but it hasn't yet occurred to him how literally true that might be.

Still, it seems like a good idea to go chop some extra firewood just in case, to have around the camp. The woods here are absolutely brimming with mushrooms and berries and edible roots and things that would be a luxury to find un-mutated and minimally-irradiated back home, and he considers trying to gather some of those too as long as he's out, but he decides it'll depend on whether the frost he can smell in the air turns into snow. ]
taediosum: (pic#17385307)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-06-22 01:55 am (UTC)(link)
[ He's been cold, before. There are mountains around the Mojave, the ruins of snowy ski resorts built up into distant, secluded settlements, among some of them. He's hiked miserably through snow and frozen in streaming sleet, and shivered so hard he thought for certain his teeth would chip when they chattered. But none of that was ever so miserable as this.

The cold is far from severe, and even just his usual layers should be enough to keep the chill at bay, especially in collaboration with his tendency to keep moving, to always be doing something (even if that something is only idly pacing, half the time). But none of it helps. He's more exhausted, more sluggish, with every degree the temperature drops. And it's not just physical - it's in his head, too. Even thinking takes an effort, the colder he gets. He only feels marginally better when he's able to huddle close to a fire or bundle up on one of the convoy's interior couches, but that's not an option all the time. Arcade doesn't let it be, because he doesn't want to sit idle and useless while everyone else pitches in.

That's why he's in the woods, too. Not to chop firewood (there are drifters both better suited to that chore and in better condition for it), but to forage while he can. He made sure to stop and build up a bit of heat by the nearest fire, on his way past the boundaries of camp. Now, though, that warmth seems to be sapping away from him almost tangibly, with every passing second.

He doesn't even really register the intermittent sound of someone working away among the nearby trees, as focused intently on his own self-appointed work as he is. And on just keeping his feet, a task that seems increasingly more difficult than properly identifying berries and mushrooms, as he goes. (Not that that's so easy, with all the wool packed into his skull, either.)

When he starts to lean down toward another healthy looking patch of green herbs, the world around him swims suddenly to the side, swaying as he slumps against the nearest tree. Before he can stop himself, he's sitting down - or dropping, at least, dragged down by a freshly overwhelming wave of fatigue. Falling asleep here definitely isn't a good idea, but in spite of the shivering, he thinks he just might. ]
taediosum: (pic#17385306)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-06-23 01:09 am (UTC)(link)
[ The sound of Danse's voice doesn't rouse him, but the hand on him does - almost immediately. Everything else about him still moves slowly, as if he's underwater, as he struggles to open his eyes, to process where he is and what exactly is going on. But that initial start and the way he leans into Danse's hand is swift and abrupt.

Arcade doesn't particularly enjoy unsolicited touch, least of all from people he still isn't quite sure he completely trusts. But warmth isn't something he could drag himself away from, if he tried, right now.

Danse doesn't have to move closer, because Arcade does it for him, arms (all four of them) pushing into the extra space under his jacket, trying to sap the body heat from him. He might not die out here if he can't, but he certainly won't be able to move again under his own power. Working on instinct that isn't entirely his own (nor is it entirely human), instinct he'll be mortified by later when he can reason well enough to be, he slumps, half-conscious, into the only source of heat in this whole freezing forest. ]
taediosum: (pic#17385315)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-06-24 06:34 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Arcade moves against him like he might try to slither under his clothes entirely, if he could, unthinking beyond his innate desire to survive. The cold might not kill him right away, but his changed mind and body react as if it might, relaxing only fractionally when he's pulled as close as he can get, the heat source obligingly draping around him.

It takes a few minutes of consistent warmth pushing back that bone-deep chill before he actually seems to stir. His glasses are askew, his cheek pressed hard into Danse's shoulder, and though he doesn't have the energy yet to move, his confused grimace speaks volumes.

At least he can recognize the body wrapped around his (or that he's... unceremoniously wrapped around) without looking up. (For reasons he won't be examining, right now.) ]


Danse...? What happened?

[ He's been walking around in a haze for so many days, now, that it doesn't alarm him as much as it should to come to in a patch of wood he only half remembers. Aggressively hugging a man who, until lately, has only barely tolerated his presence, though? That's definitely new. ]
taediosum: (pic#17385379)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-06-26 12:58 am (UTC)(link)
[ Oh, great. So it sounds like he's gone completely out of his mind and managed to make himself look like an utter incompetent in one fell swoop. And... for some reason, he can't seem to disentangle himself, even now. It's almost like his arms have gone numb - and maybe they did, a little, from the chill - but he can still feel them. He just can't actually make them move. Which maybe would only be a regular kind of bad, if at least two of his hands weren't pressed firmly to the small of Danse's back.

(Then again, maybe not being able to move is a blessing, when so much as wiggling his fingers might seem, at best, wildly inappropriate, in this position.) ]


Oh. Well. I think I'm... Probably still alive. So, no real reason for concern. Probably.

[ He's been less reassuring, he's sure, his voice still half-muffled against Danse. But not by much. ]

I think I just got, uh, a little too cold. I might just need - a minute.
taediosum: (pic#17385366)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-06-28 03:24 am (UTC)(link)
[ Don't make him think about the desert, Danse. All he wants to do is curl up on a large, flat, hot rock somewhere... Okay, definitely still out of direct sunlight. But avoiding a sunburn doesn't mean he can't entertain the thought of otherwise baking in the Mojave heat, right now.

Even if he's presently the furthest thing from it. Not that Danse isn't doing an admirable job of trying to warm him back up. Under ordinary circumstances, he'd feel like a furnace, Arcade thinks, completely unbearable to be pressed up against for too long. Now, though, he might actually be the only thing keeping Arcade from slipping into some kind of hibernative coma - at best.

Which is admirable, really. He just isn't making it any better with the conversation. ]


You have me at a disadvantage, then.

[ His tone is definitely dry enough he'll make himself homesick if he thinks on it too long.

So he focuses on struggling to will the feeling back into his limbs, instead. With an almost pained hiss, Arcade manages at last to pull one of his hands away from Danse (one of the ones pressed to his upper back, thankfully) flexing his fingers uncomfortably beneath his jacket. A soft, audible, still shaky exhale feathers across Danse's neck as Arcade shifts back against him, unaware of his increasing discomfort (as preoccupied as he is with his own). ]
taediosum: (pic#17385313)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-07-01 01:21 am (UTC)(link)
[ Arcade is still distracted by the sensation and mobility returning, slowly, to his limbs to make much note of Danse abruptly tensing against him. If he registers it at all, he simply automatically files it away as more of that mild, dutiful discomfort. Not a good thing, but also not of much concern. And all the more reason to keep straining to regain some semblance of control over himself, so that he can free Danse from this awkward obligation as soon as possible. And both of them from the whole... situation.

But that strained, impatient question does get through to him, sparking a flash of frustrated annoyance— ]


Oh, sure. This completely unprecedented problem I'm experiencing for the first time ever should only last another five minutes or so. My prediction is based on nothing, of course, so it's probably fairly inaccurate.

[ Of course, it's not until Arcade opens his mouth and takes a deeper breath after snapping at him that he tastes the air. That inadvertent, inescapable new sense is one he's still getting used to, still trying to figure out how to read more fully than pure instinct allows - but he knows the difference between a vital read that spells irritation and one that trends toward... other feelings, at this point.

For one, those stress hormones and strained, rapid signs always taste bad. Bitter, metallic, flat flavors that linger unpleasantly long, just like the pain or discomfort causing them. This tastes warm and rich and not like anything he can immediately place, but far from bad.

Arcade awkwardly clears his throat, realizing now that he's making things worse, but. Maybe not in the way he initially assumed. He forces his scaled hands apart at the center of Danse's back, and manages to slide them away from where they've been pinned, but only so far. He's still too cold to try to fight off the fatigue in any meaningful way, but he can at least put an inch or two of breathing room between them. Even if it immediately makes him shiver again. ]


Listen— I appreciate the effort, but I'm not sure this is going to work fast enough to preserve your comfort, so...
taediosum: (pic#17385382)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-07-03 03:48 am (UTC)(link)
[ There's a logical connection here that Arcade hadn't quite gone so far as to make, himself, before Danse spoke up again. But it doesn't take much to push him to the right conclusion, when Danse's flagrant unease doesn't even split the difference between the simple, straightforward kind of discomfort Arcade assumed he was causing and the ever so slightly more complicated kind that that deep, obvious blush directly indicates.

The same blush that he can't look at without wanting desperately to bury his face against it, soaking up the residual heat. Danse looks like he's liable to start steaming in the frosty, open air any second now. And Arcade can't even feel if his own face is red, with the unfortunate revelation unspooling behind his stunned pause. His face just feels cold. His blood just feels cold.

So getting abruptly to his feet and retreating into the trees (maybe to find somewhere to deliberately go and die, now) is probably still out of the question.

His already reeling mind short-circuits briefly at Danse's insistent suggestion, skipping right past reasonable and landing on an old scrap of medical advice about how to handle immediate, freezing hypothermia. The last thing he needs to be thinking about is removing clothing to better share body heat, especially when he can just imagine how good it might feel to slide both sets of hands into any opening they can find in Danse's outfit. And there might be a few; his clothes have clearly seen better days. Less transformative ones, certainly. ]


Uh. Maybe you should... be a little clearer. More specific. If there's a better way to do this—

[ That'd be great, actually. But Arcade seriously doubts it, and he's hesitant to just go snuggling in again (the part of him that's still managing to think clearly enough to fight that instinct, at least). ]

What can I do that isn't going to make this exponentially worse for you?
taediosum: (pic#12456997)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-07-03 11:20 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Arcade is doing his best not to find this uncomfortable stalemate as frustrating as it is, because technically Danse is more than likely presently responsible for saving his life. Or near to it, at the very least. He doesn't know what happens if he winds up on his own, out here, half frozen. Maybe he'll simply slip into some form of hibernation, readily able to thaw once the weather turns again. But given the potential alternatives, it isn't a gamble he really wants to take.

On the other hand, neither is trying to wiggle his way inside Danse's half ruined coveralls and soak up all his body heat just to survive. Not when they've only just barely gotten to the point of being able to behave relatively normally when in each other's presence. This is definitely going to ruin that.

Whether it's the serpent part of him or pure stubborn survival instinct, though, eventually he's forced to give in. With an irritable, still shivery sigh, Arcade slumps closer again. ]


Fine.

[ He doesn't settle, though, still moving in stuttering fits and starts as he pulls his arms out of his sleeves. The dirty white lab coat is okay insulation, ordinarily, but it's not going to help, here. And even if he isn't quite willing to shed the shirt underneath it, it still brings them considerably closer with only that threadbare barrier left, on his part.

He only barely manages to resist temptation, scaled palms pressing to the hirsute swath of chest bared by Danse's broken zipper but not sliding under the fabric. ]


But I wash my hands of any further responsibility, should you continue to have a perfectly natural reaction to my proximity.

[ The emphasis of sarcasm makes it sound far less understanding than he actually is. ]
taediosum: (pic#17385347)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-07-04 08:23 pm (UTC)(link)
[ His other hands join the scaled set, after another moment of harsh internal debate. Danse's skin feels far warmer bare than it does over his clothes, though; his other fingers almost feel normal again, even after only a few seconds' worth of contact. How long it'll last is the problem, given how slowed his circulation seems to be - that sluggish feeling persists, making him feel clumsy and useless even just sitting down, and a truck with the heater on high feels like a prospect several small eons away from his present reality. So he'll just have to bear up under it, for both their sakes.

As preoccupied as he is with trying to find a balance between taking what's offered and taking some kind of unintentional advantage, Arcade only distantly takes note of Danse covering them up. Or of him talking, unfortunately.

Arcade's brow furrows, confusion in it rather than annoyance, now, as he very seriously contemplates a spot somewhere between the end of his nose and Danse's other shoulder (when he dropped his head back down to rest on the other again, he can't recall). His scaled hands slip farther under the fabric parted around them, after all, their palms oddly smooth between those soft textured ridges patterned neatly across them. ]


Take issue? With you coming to rescue me? Yeah. Tall, dark, and handsome saving the day. What a nightmare.
taediosum: (pic#17385366)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-07-08 02:02 am (UTC)(link)
[ It's unfortunate that Danse is only more charming the more flustered he grows. That helpless noise, in particular, is wildly intriguing in a way Arcade has to put real effort into ignoring - though that doesn't change the pleasant warmth that it sparks, anyway.

Actual warmth, at that. He's almost starting to feel a little more human, the longer they're pressed together like this. Even Danse's hands rubbing at his back are beginning to feel a little more there, gentle friction building up a gentle heat in his freezing skin. It's just also unfortunate that it isn't making him want to try his luck at standing up any time soon. He'd much rather stay curled up here and pressed to as much of that bare skin as he can reach—

Also not a thought he is entertaining, as he awkwardly clears his throat. ]


I don't. I mean - it's not like I am thinking of you... like that. It was more a statement of objective fact, if anything.

[ One he's sure he's pointed out, before, if off-handedly and with some noted sarcasm. But when a man confesses that he was built in a lab, of course it's the natural next assumption that he was also made to be upsettingly gorgeous on purpose. ]

The same way that you, uh, enjoying this is purely a function of biology, and not a commentary on my personal - anything. That is, I won't take it personally, anyway.
taediosum: (pic#17385366)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-07-19 11:01 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Arcade sighs as the coat drapes around him, its borrowed heat like a furnace briefly turned on at his back. That awkward stiffness and the fatigue fogging his mind have all but dissipated, now - at least where it counts - and the chilled numbness is fading faster with every little concession to get closer.

Which only makes the turn their conversation is taking that much more of a minefield to navigate. Though maybe that's being a tad hyperbolic. He doesn't find Danse the least bit repellent, and Danse apparently has some far more in-depth thoughts on the matter, in his regard. This should be a good thing, probably. But Arcade has gone too long without having to navigate the complicated waters of someone earnestly being attracted to him (as opposed to meaningless, insincere flirting). He doesn't think brushing this all off with some mildly sarcastic humor is the right move, here, even if it is his knee-jerk reflex. ]


Well, no pressure or anything, right?

[ He regrets the poor phrasing as soon as he's said it, wincing tangibly against Danse's shoulder. ]

Not... like that. I mean, uh, I'm flattered. Maybe under different circumstances, this would be a mutually enjoyable experience. But I already feel like I'm taking advantage of your - hospitality.

[ And maybe whatever attraction is there, too even if only unintentionally. (Then again, maybe Danse really just is that broadly altruistic, under the right circumstances.) ]
taediosum: (pic#17385381)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-07-26 03:31 am (UTC)(link)
I'm pretty sure basic survival training doesn't include anything about continuously hitting on the person you're trying to help survive.

[ His tone is more than simply wry, though there's a lightness to it that still belies the obvious good humor beneath. He may be able to readily and easily brush past any claims of altruism on his part, but the seemingly constant reaffirmation of his apparent attractiveness are harder to ignore.

It's not that Arcade lacks in self-esteem. He might be assertively self-effacing, most of the time, but that doesn't mean he thinks himself somehow unworthy or unlikable (or, yes, particularly unattractive, either). He's also not unused to being flattered or hit with the frequent, flagrantly casual come-on. But praise from someone who actually, honestly means it always does hit differently.

And it softens the edges of the walls he puts up, whether he wants it to or not.

His fingertips tap idly against Danse's bare chest, the scaled set dragging lightly over warm skin. His face actually does feel a touch hotter, now, but without being able to see himself blush, he can't be sure it isn't purely psychosomatic. ]


By all means, though.
taediosum: (pic#17385313)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-08-30 01:06 am (UTC)(link)
[ Leaving the city is the only thing Arcade is in better spirits about. Well, other than having a decent surplus of supplies, for once. But the experience of procuring it all? Not one he's eager to keep living in for long. As initially thrilling as it was to finally see some novel sign of civilization - much bigger than the average garage or outpost they've been through - the messy, chaotic maze of the city was more than enough to make him regret that thought. More than once.

Maybe that's why he's on his way to the Hubcap. Almost certainly it is, as much as he'd like to steal a drink and at least half an hour to himself to try to unwind a little.

Company isn't something he's expecting, and his knee-jerk reflex is to march right back down the steps behind him as soon as he realizes he's walked in on someone. Before he can turn to go, though, Danse makes their awkward greetings official. ]


Uh, better.

[ Arcade offers this with little enthusiasm, a not so thin thread of chagrin worming its way into his weary facade. He hasn't passed out recently because the cold has been receding, and that's the question he assumes he's actually answering. Embarrassing to field, but probably fair, considering the source.

Before he can decide between further uncomfortable smalltalk or excusing himself as if he has anywhere else to be, though, that thought pops, unprompted, into his head. Arcade flinches, blinking, not far enough away from that horrible, glowing desert scrub to be freshly alarmed but still suitably startled. ]


—Excuse me?

[ It's hard to be annoyed with the compliment, as it registers, and maybe he's straightening up a little, a hand plucking at the tidier fabric of his new shirt. (Though he would insist he isn't preening.) ]

If you're going to talk about how I look, you could at least do it out loud.
taediosum: (pic#17385340)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-08-31 12:59 am (UTC)(link)
[ That's what you want, huh?

Arcade doesn't answer, but the faintest suggestion of a smile flickers across his face. There's a shift in color, too, where his scales are visible - that faded white and gold bleeds to soft orange-tinted pink for just a moment, a brief flush of brighter color that accompanies the private thrill that harmless phrasing sends through him. It sounds less like an accusation than an offer, and he's not at all unhappy to be proven right, when Danse eventually continues.

Even if, in Arcade's estimation, he's laying it on pretty thick. ]


Plenty. Thanks.

[ Since Danse is making such quick work of the booze, though, he'd probably better move. Stepping around to slide behind the bar, Arcade starts puzzling his way through the many and varied new bottles stocking it - many of which don't have any discernible labeling. What was there has been worn away by time and exposure, or torn off by whoever handled them last. But a fair few of the newest acquisitions are in good enough condition to be somewhat legible, still. At least enough so for him to find a wine that doesn't look completely poisonous.

He reaches for a chipped glass with one of his scaled hands, as the human set work on opening the bottle. That part of him they'd probably leave off a billboard. ]


Do I owe your newfound talent for very verbose flattery to the liquor, or is it just good spirits?
taediosum: (pic#15693871)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-09-13 02:51 am (UTC)(link)
[ Brows raised, Arcade glances back at him. The dubious edge that colors the look melts away in his consideration, as he assesses both Danse and the glass in his hand. ]

Maybe you should let it be more often.

[ He did ask for it, but if Danse is going to assume he regrets that, now, well. He's definitely only getting one-way telepathy out of this deal. (Which is confirmation Arcade is grateful for, honestly.)

He shrugs as he pours himself a glass, waving away the suggestion with one of his free hands. ]


It's impossible not to get some practice in, the longer I'm stuck with these, but my fine motor control is still a far cry from that kind of precision. I'd much rather stick to lower stakes activities, for now.
taediosum: (pic#15975937)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-09-13 08:40 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Arcade leaves that agreement without further comment, setting everything behind the bar back to rights before rounding to the other side again. With only Danse at the bar, there are plenty of open seats to choose from, but Arcade goes against his usual preference and slides onto the one next to him.

He hasn't had enough to drink, yet, to justify the sidelong glance he steals as he sits down. But he can't possibly be the only one to have looked, today. Those jeans are considerably more well-fitted than the coveralls were. ]


As much as my skin does, surprisingly. [ He taps a couple of scaled fingertips on the bartop, as he takes a cautious sip from his glass. Minimal grimacing. It's not that bad, actually. ] Maybe more so. They're weirdly sensitive to some things, not so much to others.

[ Danse can probably guess at some of what fits into the latter category. He's seen Arcade shrug off enough pointed violence, by now. ]
taediosum: (pic#17385444)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-09-27 03:05 am (UTC)(link)
Well - temperature, for one.

[ But that feels self-evident, at this point, too. The rest of him seems to be the same, these days. Ruled by the ambient temperature wherever he is - or his desire to be somewhere it suits him better.

The faint pink flush that crosses his face this time is perfectly mundane, only tinting his skin a darker shade. He focuses on his glass, shrugging a shoulder in a way that is not at all casual or smooth. ]


And touch. Pressure. Luckily, I have an easy enough time avoiding that.

[ He glances at Danse again, a self-deprecating smile flitting across his lips. ]

Generally speaking.
taediosum: (pic#17385313)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-09-30 02:31 am (UTC)(link)
[ Arcade lets out a huff of breath that was maybe meant to be a laugh, but sounds too quietly embarrassed for it. He focuses more intently on the glass in front of him, now less than half full. ]

If it was painful, it'd be a lot easier to explain.

[ Less weirdly mortifying, at any rate. This time, the pink creeping into his complexion is only in his skin. ]

Oversensitive is a better word for it, I guess.
taediosum: (pic#15693868)

[personal profile] taediosum 2025-10-13 08:37 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Arcade laughs, though there's nothing loud or bold about that sound, either. ]

Like I said, it's not exactly difficult when most people just sort of naturally avoid it. And I don't invite it.

[ Both of which he's used to, already, so it's convenient all around.

Though the thought does bring up another, tailing behind it in a narrow wake of concern. ]


...And you don't have to worry about anything, you know, the other day— Everything was way too numb for it to really matter.